


What did you want to do, huh?

by pearky



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Drinking, Drunken Kissing, F slur, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Minor Violence, Unrequited Love, i mean kinda, okay so i have some crazy drunk stories that im projecting into them
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-09-28 17:28:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20429729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pearky/pseuds/pearky
Summary: He feels too drunk when Sasuke turns to say goodbye to him, he can barely keep his balance as those pretty eyes look at him. Maybe it’s just that his legs grow weak when Sasuke looks at him like /that/.





	What did you want to do, huh?

Sasuke is so gorgeous. He really is, Naruto can’t stop staring even though the cigarette smoke is burning his eyes out and he wants to blink away the tears. Still, he sits and stares at his best friend and tries to make it seem like he’s just paying attention to whatever story Sasuke is telling.

He isn’t. He’s paying attention to the way his eyelashes flutter closed when he laughs, how his lips shine when they curl into a smile, how his dimple moves when he smirks over at Karin. He’s watching smoke spill out from between his lips, the cigarette dangling between his fingers in a way that is strangely erotic, that makes Naruto want to drink the smoke from Sasuke’s lungs.

Sasuke’s a surprisingly good storyteller when he’s drunk like this, words falling from those gorgeous lips freely now that he’s not putting up that stupid mysterious guy act that Naruto despises. He gestures with his cigarette dangerously close to burning out his clothes, he makes eye contact, he slips in jokes – all very cynical, but still funny, especially to their friend group that's gotten used to Sasuke’s humour. He entertains the group for a while until Naruto is finished drinking in Sasuke’s gorgeous appearance.

He’s confused. He always has been, always is, when it comes to Sasuke. They’ve been friends for a ridiculously long time, Naruto thinks they were eight or seven when they met, which was – wow, twelve years ago, then they were friends for a few years before Sasuke moved, then they met again three years ago. He was confused when he was 12, he was a little less confused when he was 16, but he is more confused than ever now.

He doesn’t know where to place the fact that Sasuke seems just a bit disgusted at Naruto when he talks about his boyfriends, or hook-ups with guys, or the dude who flirts with him when he tends the bar on weekdays. Nor does he know what to think when he sees Sasuke get very drunk and dance with a man in the club when he swears he’s straight. Or when they kissed as a dare and Sasuke pulled him so close that they were touching chests and didn’t pull back even though they really didn’t have to kiss for that long. Right now, he doesn’t understand why Sasuke’s shoe is nudging against his calf.

But he’s not confused about what he feels for him. Hasn’t been for years.

“So the guy comes up to her, leans in very close, I can smell the cheap beer on his breath even from over the table, and he says, “Hello, my name is Lee – you’re hot, may I lick your ear?” The group breaks out in their various reactions, including Naruto, who laughs loudly and leans his head on Karin as a drunken display of affection.

“And did she let him?”

“No, she freaked out so I pulled the guy aside and sent him on his way.” Naruto loves it when Sasuke laughs his drunken laugh. He wishes Sasuke was always like this. He wishes that he stopped losing himself while suppressing his entire personality. He knows why this is, he’s realised it early on that it’s a coping mechanism after the losses he’s suffered; still, he wishes that he could somehow let him know that opening up isn’t scary, that he’s loved, that they’re there for him.

Sasuke doesn’t work like that, though. Over the several years, he’s never had a real heart to heart with him, at least not when they were both sober.

Naruto throws back another shot, he doesn’t ask what it is, Sakura bought it for him so it must be something fun. He doesn’t feel what it is. He thinks it might be whiskey, or vodka, or whatever. Tequila, maybe.

He’s pretty gone after that.

///

The rest of the evening slips away and he’s too drunk to remember most of it. He sobers up after sharing a falafel wrap with Sasuke, but it’s already late by then and they’re saying goodbye.

He watches as Sasuke kisses the girls’ cheeks, one by one, and hugs Shikamaru and Kiba. The girls say goodbye to him too before they leave but he’s staring at the raven haired man the whole time. He watches his body move, his arms look so long and graceful, his clothes fit so well on his lean but masculine frame that Naruto dreams about so often, his hair falls into his pretty eyes and Naruto swears he could melt. He watches his lips dance when he speaks, his eyelids flutter when he laughs - his heart feels like it might be torn into two with how much he _loves_ and _wants_. Elegant fingers are clutching a cigarette and Naruto feels some kind of stupid urge to take them in his mouth, taste the tobacco on them.

He feels too drunk when Sasuke turns to say goodbye to him, he can barely keep his balance as those pretty eyes look at him. Maybe it’s just that his legs grow weak when Sasuke looks at him like _that_, with lidded eyes, with his chin tilted up slightly and like he wants Naruto. He’s used to it – he knows Sasuke doesn’t want him, he’s just drunk and horny like he always is – but that doesn’t make him any less needy.

The beauty steps closer to him. “Come here, idiot,” He mutters, his voice breathy and deep. Naruto feels like he might faint with how close they are, their heads only separated by a few inches; he can smell the smoke on his hair from this vicinity.

“Not an idiot, bastard.” He returns, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip before he licks them, almost subconsciously. Sasuke has a hand on the nape of his neck and he wants to curl into the cold fingers.

“Whatever you say.” Goddamn Sasuke and his sharp tongue.

He doesn’t know what takes over him. One moment he’s still just staring at Sasuke and then he leans in, turns his head so he could capture his best friend’s lips, aching to taste and feel and hear him and his head is screaming at him to do it and who is he to deny his head what it wants.

A pair of strong hands suddenly wraps around his wrists and he finds himself being pushed back. He snaps his eyes open and finds Sasuke looking at him with disgust and anger and some emotion he can’t quite read.

“What the fuck, dude?!” Sasuke yells and shoves Naruto away from him again, who stumbles backwards on his uneasy feet. “What the fuck did you want to do, huh?” The way he yells makes Naruto’s heart break. He’s never seen Sasuke this angry. He’s even more confused by now. Wasn’t Sasuke flirting with him before?

“Fuck, no, I’m sorry, it’s jus-“

Naruto gets cut off by Sasuke spitting into his face and raising a fist at him. He closes his eyes again. He expects Sasuke’s fist to his face; instead, he feels nothing. He hesitantly wipes away the spit on his cheek.

“Uchiha, what the fuck?!” He opens his eyes to see Kiba pulling Sasuke away, holding his arms down. “Dude, calm down, what the hell?”

“You saw what he did, didn’t you? Fucker tried to kiss me!” Sasuke yells, trying to wriggle out of Kiba’s rough hold.

“So what?! Maybe if you didn’t have your head up your ass you’d realise you like it!”

“Let me the fuck go, Kiba, or I’ll beat you up too, you faggot!”

Naruto watches, too drunk to know what to do, other than start walking away. He shoots an apologetic look at Kiba, who just shakes his head dismissively, still holding Sasuke’s arms. He takes that as permission to go home. He sees Shikamaru come to handle him, too.

Fuck. Did Sasuke hate him this much? Was he seriously going to beat Naruto up for trying to kiss him? This isn’t the Sasuke Naruto knew.

He can hear the three of them yell at each other a street over but he can’t make out what they’re saying. It only fades when he catches the subway home.

**Author's Note:**

> hello hi this is sad. i hope you liked it despite it being sad. please leave a comment and kudos!! thank u very much love you bye


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